Strangers in a Strange Land
Most men are not the “main characters” in their lives. They play supporting roles instead. They stay late to finish a work project; they work for money that goes to pay the bills; they run errands and make sure the kids get to soccer practice on time.
The boss has a goal; the utility company has a goal; the kids even have a goal (pun intended). But what about us?
The truth is, most of us are strangers in a strange land. But that’s now how it should be…
Our Values Reveal Who We Are
At HeRose we talk a lot about how important it is that we understand our true identity. We are worthy, powerfully and wonderfully made. And there is nothing we can do or not do that will change that fact.
Part of what determines our true identity is knowing the values that we hold.They influence our life’s mission and our vision for the future. How can we know who we are if we don’t know what we’re willing to fight for? … or even die for?
Developing Our Core Values Statement
If you ask a man what his values are, he’ll probably say something like: “Oh, I don’t know. Honesty is important. Hard work. Taking care of your family…” Those are great values. However, our Core Values should not be developed haphazardly.
Instead, we should consider each one thoughtfully, and with the intent to commit. After all, these ideas, philosophies, principles, and sentiments are going to shape and guide our lives.
That is why we recommend that as you develop your Core Values, you follow this simple guide:
- Set aside some time – about 30 minutes or so should be enough
- Get a pen or pencil and some paper
- Think of the “ideal” version of you. Get that picture clear in your mind. What are you doing? What are you wearing? What do you look like? Who are you with?
- With that vision in your head, write down 10 – 20 words that you would use (or that you would want other people to use) to describe the “ideal you”
- Consider your list. Prune it if necessary. And consider what each entry means to you.
In the end you should have a list of around 10 words that accurately represent the values that are most important to you. You can leave it at that, with just those words, or you can develop them with clarification, or descriptions. It’s your Values Statement after all!
How Our Core Values Better Our Lives
In their book Total Alignment: Tools and Tactics for Streamlining Your Organization, Riaz and Linda Khadem summarize the value-to-behavior for new businesses.
However, this 4-step process can be adapted for individuals as well:
- Define our Core Values
- Identify the behaviors and habits that align with those values
- Change our behaviors and habits
- Encourage and facilitate change in one another
When your Core Values are finalized, print them out, frame them, pin them up, or whatever you want to do. But make sure that they are visible and easily-referenced. And remember: these values will shape the direction of your life.
The 5th Step to Better Our Lives
The last and final recommendation is to invite others into this conversation. We need a group of men to hold us accountable to these core values in our everyday lives. What better way than to share these core values with men who are striving for better lives as well.
We invite you to begin this process of sharing by joining the private Herose Facebook group: Heroic Men Mastermind- Family, Business, Service and posting your core values to the group. One, it’ll get you to actually complete the core values exercise and secondly it’ll help you stay true to these values daily. We encourage you to never just learn for the sake of intellectual understanding, transform your life by putting into action what you have learned.
