I remember right before my oldest daughter was born, I think it was November time and she was due in January of 2014. My wife and I sat down and we talked about how things were going to change. One of the topics that came up was time together. We both vowed then to not let our children get in the way of us spending time together as husband and wife. A year later as I was thinking about what to get my wife for Christmas, my mind flashed back over the past year and directly to that conversation. We had failed to keep that commitment. So I decided to tackle a stand and make a change. Here are the three excuses to avoid and how to avoid them when making date night a priority in your marriage.
- We don’t have the time
This was going to be my excuse after I realized a whole year had passed and we now had a 1 year old and zero dates over the past year. So I decided to get a calendar and schedule out 24 date nights for the next coming year. I booked, planned and even paid for 2 date nights a month. One date night was planned in and I planned one date night out. I put all of these dates in a nice calendar and gave it to my wife for Christamas.
- We don’t have the money
There are definitely great lessons in keeping to a budget and being intentional about your finances, but using this as an excuse to not spend time with your wife is just poor planning. My wife and I have had to decide to invest in us as a marriage and we have put into our budget money to spend on our date nights and we have even added a budget for babysitting. Date nights are important, in my opinion it is one of the most important investments you can make for your home.
- We don’t have the energy
Life will continue to add tasks and items that fill the day with running around from doctors appointments, sporting events, and just good ‘ol family time. It is natural to feel totally exhausted at the end of the day and the end of the week. However, love is not about how you feel it is about what you do. I have vowed to never let my energy levels or attitude impede my duty to be the best husband and father I can be. One of the things that I do when I am feeling low energy before a date night is I turn on some good music and I look forward to the events of the night with an optimistic and enthusiastic lens.
Ever since I had that realization after my first daughter was born my wife and I have made date nights a scheduled priority every week. No matter what happens in the week on Friday evening my wife and I are on a date. Sometimes that date night is simple and we stay home and play a game or make a meal together. Other times we go out for an activity like dinner, dancing or even an arcade. The point is that we as men need to take responsibility for our marriages and for date night. Don’t let these excuses get in the way of you having a great marriage.
